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Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Sh*t Men Say...and the Completely Irrational Thoughts That Follow

Lately men have said something to me, and then my brain went somewhere else completely. So I thought I'd share.

'You should model!'

That's sweet...he thinks I'm pretty. If he knew how much makeup, lighting, and airbrushing went into how those girls look! Oh! That means he things I'm 'model' pretty in the real world. Well that's a super compliment. Wait no....I can't model. In model standards my perfectly acceptable size 4/6 frame is practically obese. Also I'm ancient. I'm 28. That's like. An octogenarian in model years. Ick. Why couldn't he just say I'm pretty. Not cute though. I freaking hate 'cute'.

'You look great/amazing/awesome/nice today!'

Oh wow. That's so sweet. He noticed I put in some extra effort today. Wait. He said I look nice TODAY. What do I look like every other day.

*For fellas and ladies, I have learned it is better to compliment something specific because I am not the only crazy pants out there. I like what you did with your hair today, I like those shoes, did you do something different with your makeup, I love that lipstick ect.*

'I'm not a mind reader!'

No, no you aren't. You are however an IDIOT, because I specifically told you my thoughts on this issue. You either chose to ignore them, or your brain double as a sieve. Neither option looks good for you.


This is by far the absolute worst thing you can say to me or any woman while in the midst of a discussion. If I have laid out my argument with points and counter points and taken time to explain myself and my stance and you come back with 'ok', I'm literally killing you 7 different ways in my mind.

Voyage of the Mee Mee


Kathy@MoreCoffeeLessTalky said...

a couple of years ago, i found a picture of ny husband and i back when we first got together in 1999 and i said: oh, look how pretty and skinny i was back then! to which eh replied: what are you talking about? you're still pretty.


i may have called him a wangface and walked away.

Vodka and Soda

Amanda - Voyage of the MeeMee said...

'Ok' Ugh. This needs to be stricken from our language. Petition?!

MarlaJan said...

HOW DID I NOT KNOW ABOUT THIS LINKUP?!?!?!? I'm so mad, all the cool kids are doing it.

I usually post dumb dhit Steve says on my FB for all to see. Recently he said "Damn, you were so hot then"

I almost punched him. I also did NOT post that!

Whitney Ellen said...

"Cute" makes me so stabby. Actually, I take offense to "cute", typically. NO!

Princess Burlap said...

"Ok" is NOT ok. Especially when it comes with an unspoken "and your point is...?"

Courtney B said...

It sounds like he's trying with the compliments? Model AND you look nice today? ha ha! Maybe?? I have friends who's hubs never compliment them and I would probably kill my hubs if he were the same way.
I HATE the simple "ok" Why do they think that will get them out of a discussion, argument, whatever??

Kellee the Caffeinated said...

hahahha they can never win!

Angi Solle said...

My boyfriend normally stays away from compliments, not because he doesn't want to give them to me, but because I go all crazy over analyzing on his ass every time! The word 'Ok' needs to be destroyed. I could punch a person after that one!


Anonymous said...

UGH. I hate the "I'm not a mind reader" comment, it drives me crazy. We don't expect them to be, we just expect them to USE COMMON SENSE!

Rachel said...

Ugh, "okay" and "I'm not a mind reader." You wouldn't have to read minds if you just. listened.
- Rachel @ With Love, Rachel

Setarra said...

Just spit my tea out in laughter. Thank you. I really do hate 'ok'. I'm sitting here trying to have an intellectual conversation and resolve the issue WITHOUT YELLING (hello control) and then he responds with, "Ok" which to me acts as another form of "shut up". I literally blow up afterwards lol.

Katie Elizabeth said...

Haha! OK is theee worst! My second "favorite" would have to be fine. That one pisses me off too!

jackie jade said...

ahhh I hate "ok" too - so not helpful! and I usually lay it all out there too, so i'm not expecting any kind of mind-reading whatsoever!
-- jackie @ jade and oak

Tiffany said...

Once upon a time when I was a 4/6 I was definitely called fat and then I decided that modeling was NOT worth it. I gots some hips, ya know?

And I don't expect them to read minds, but REMEMBERING things would be lovely enough!