Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Mommy Confessions: This morning...I lost my shiz...or at least I wanted to.

* I wrote this yesterday, when I was still freshly angry. 
I re-read it today, and I still find it amusing...so...yeah.*


This morning....there was a tube of black ink/paint in the wash.

In the load of half dry clothes.

Which means I've essentially baked in the ink.

Which means the clothes are ruined.



I know I had put it out into the universe that I wanted new clothes.

This is NOT what I meant.

This is one of those moments in parenting where you really want to ask your child: 'Da fuq?!?!?!?!'



No I don't talk to Boomer like that. But I really, really, really wanted to.

For Example: 

  • 'Where in 'da fuq' did you come up with this tube of clothing killer?'
  • 'I found it on the floor at Mimi's house.'
  • 'Why in 'da fuq' would you just take something from Mimi's house?'
  • 'I don't know Mommy.'
  • 'Who in 'da fuq' is going to buy me new clothes for work?'
  • silence....
  • 'What in 'da fuq' is the matter with you?!?!?!?!'
  • 'Sorry mommy...want to pray about it?'


So...we had the who, what, why, where conversation minus all the Eff bombs. Then she drops Jesus in the mix.



NO I DON'T WANT TO FREAKING PRAY ABOUT IT!!!!!

I want my clothes not to be messed up. I want for my kid to not be the most full of mischief seven year old in Columbus. I WANT to throw an tantrum.


I didn't. I told Boomer I needed some time alone. So I went upstairs, and took another shower. You can never be too clean, and the water calms me down.

I got out. I told her I loved her very much. She apologized, I told her I forgave her, and to stop being a klepto. Then we all went about our morning.

Good day all.


6 comments:

Whitney Ellen said...

Time to pimp her out on Craigslist for her cleaning services.

Gwen said...

That's got to be hard to not just go off. Good for you for keeping your cool, AND for sharing on here what you were really thinking!

Tiffany @ Polka Dotted Cats said...

Best method ever...whenever you get caught or in trouble throw Jesus into the mix!

Oh goodness. I am sorry about your clothes, but this IS hilarious.

Nikki Mitchell said...

Love these ecards! I definitely laughed reading this but then instantly was thrown back to a time where there was a stick of gum left in my jeans and got everywhere. I remember the sadness/shock/anger. Glad you have a great relationship with your daughter. I know a lot of people who would have just grounded there children forever! lol

Kelli @She Crab Soup said...

Oh kids, mine is only 3 and sometimes I still want to drop the F-Bomb at things she does. Even if I'm not saying them out loud they are flying around in my brain bouncing off my skull while I very calmly tell her she's being a meany head.

Regina said...

Miss LMA, Boomer is telling you to trust in God.. When you said you put it out in the universe that you need new clothes.. Well consider Boomer an agent of answering prayer. Oh but please do tell her to stop taking stuff from Momma Boom's house cause she will get in trouble over that...